I should have seen it coming. I was attending a Christmas function last night and another Mom came up to me to congratulate me on the baby. She then asked my age and I should have known right then and there where this was headed. I told her that even though I felt 90 today, I was truly only 33. I thought that was more Christian than what I really wanted to say!! HA!:) Thankfully God's grace saved me once again from saying something my grumpy, nauseated self wanted to say.
Anyway, we were chatting about who my OB was (a cool dude I really like by the way and I have never ever ever had a male OB), and she then piped up and asked if I was worried. I knew exactly what she was getting to, but I wanted her to say it. She then asked if I was going to do all that testing, and I politely said "no." She then replied with an "oh really, I would have thought with your high risk situation that you would have to go to specialist or something."
I will not share the rest of the conversation even though I pray God's grace and not my venom came forth from me. I took that opportunity to explain to her that all that testing means nothing to someone who views life as a gift from God and to be cherished as such. She shook her head in agreement with me, but frankly I just wanted to SCREAM!!!! Why could she just not have said congratulations and moved on? Did she want me to break down and sob that I might have another David?
This is also frankly ironic that this woman would imply that having another David would be a negative thing, because today I was cleaning out a drawer and found my Beth Moore bible study on King David. (I had bought a gift card for a teacher and had "temporarily misplaced it")! Anyway, I started the bible study right after David's birth and just recently finished it with a group of women here in the community. David can be a challenge to raise, but not due to his Down Syndrome as much as his red-headed adamant self!
Reading the account in the bible where David was chosen by Samuel to be the next king truly brings me to tears. David was Jesse's least likely son to be chosen as the king. But 1 Samuel 16:7 says it all- "The Lord said to Samuel, Do not consider his appearance or his height for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart."
No wonder this sweet woman was all worried about me having another child with DS. Man cannot get over David's imperfections, but the Lord looks only at our heart. For David that is wonderful news, because his heart is only full of love. Yes, David has a chromosomal abnormality but just like King David he can be fully used to serve God.
I will choose to go to bed tonight with that knowledge in my heart versus the grumpy "can you believe she said that" attitude that I would really like to hash out with Mike all night!!! I too need to remember that God looks at the heart-perhaps beeping at that sweet old man that wasn't responding to the green light fast enough for me today would qualify as one of those teachable moments for me that God looks at our heart. Hopefully this sweet old man has hearing issues and didn't hear the loud beep of my Honda Pilot this morning. Wherever he is, I pray that he will understand that I just needed some Gatorade to get through the morning and I really meant no harm: